6 Comments

What seems equally as important to 1) identifying these injustices done by individuals and organizations (as you have done), is also 2) documenting them as continued evidence against them (as you have also done). Excellent.

What's needed is a crowd-based system of contributing ongoing evidence to a single, yet decentralized, network for each entity. Then all the evidence would be forever bound in time to their own comments, etc. Of course organizations can change stances, get new mgmt, etc. But at least they could never lie and say: "We never said that!"

Forgiving is an choice. Forgetting should not be for commercial organizations, public offices, etc.

Expand full comment

I really like that there are many professionals finally coming around to the imbalance in male support systems available, and offering more services. I've been watching this lady's videos lately specifically about how toxic women manipulate and destroy men. Not sure if it's ok to post here, but it's been spot-on so far from what I've experienced in my life from impossible relationship dynamics:

https://www.youtube.com/@LiseLeblanc/videos

Expand full comment

I think this is an important issue, as is sexual violence between women. (my mother had some sexual inappriopriate behaviour towards me, and in front of me - so I know it's not only about men against women)

But one question: why is withholding sex abuse?

If withholding sex is abuse, that would mean that 'giving' sex is a duty, which sounds absurd to me. Sex is something to be enjoyed by both partners, and if it doesn't feel good it shouldn't happen.

Expand full comment

Withholding can be manipulation, and the wheel above clearly says "threatening to leave him, to withhold sex ~ to commit suicide, to report him to welfare or work"

Threatening with anything like this is manipulation. And, withholding context, as in the inference above, inferring that I'm trying to say that withholding sex is abuse, is your issue, not mine. Deal with that shit instead of projecting it.

I don't believe in monogamy because of the premise you present. Humans were meant to enjoy sex, and marriage is more of a construct of owning the sexuality of another than it is mutual reward. If one isn't having enjoyable sex, they should realize the option to go somewhere else for fulfillment and mutuality.

Expand full comment

Precisely. So, according to them, men withholding sex from women is abuse, and I would bet money that they'd say women withholding sex from men is "empowerment."

That whole disclaimer is disturbing and yet unsurprising. "We don't see it," not "Studies show". Typical pseudoscientific weasel words. I'd wager that today women abusing their partners in one way or another is just as prevalent.

Expand full comment

Pretty much everything in life is contractual. Many people just do so unconsciously, or with expectations that they find others to happen to fulfill... such as "I buy her dinner, and she gives me sex" or similar. Then when that pattern has been filled a number of times, it seems like a standing order that can be expected. So it's very "grey" area when neither party has ever openly discussed such concepts to know what the ACTUAL expectations. Then one day, one of them doesn't perform, the other feels like they got cheated on the "contract", and it all goes bad fast.

That being said... IF there are certain "agreements" already in place that do in essence create contractual "duty", and THEN one of them withholds from the contract (could be anything, but in THIS case: the woman withholding sex) THEN it COULD be considered "abuse" in some scenarios, depending on her INTENTIONS. If she is doing it to be "abusive" then why would it not actually be "abusive"?

Expand full comment